Bones or No bones?

Have you heard about bones day and no bones day?

On one of the many social media platforms, there is an adorable 13-year-old pug named Noodles. If he has a bones day it means that the day is all good, get out there and kick bum. If it is a no-bones day then you get to take it easy on yourself. Maybe stay in bed a little longer, or allow yourself to wallow in sadness for a few minutes extra.

Apart from the silliness of letting a dog on the internet tell you what to do with your day, I think this comes with a good message about mental health. Frequently we don't let ourselves fully feel the bad things, heck even the good things. We tamp down and feelings and get on with it. For me, that leads to it all breaking through at the most inconvenient time. When I was laid off it took me a really long time to not feel guilty about letting down my coworkers. As though my being let go was my fault. As though the very toxic person I was working for actually thought about or cared about anyone else's mental health but her own. I would get teary in traffic or doing the laundry. I did allow myself to sit in it though and really feel it. For the first time when something potentially scarring happened, I didn't brush it off only to have to deal with it later. Admittedly I had the time to do it, and the support from my family. What would happen though if we just gave people the time and space to actually deal with themselves. What if along with sick days we were given actual mental health days?

It shouldn't be an earth-shattering practice. Everyone needs them from time to time. In June of 2020, I found out on a Monday (at work) that my grandfather was passing away. He didn't let go until the following Saturday. I spent that whole week at work just going through the motions. I mean, it was better having something to do but I could have used a least a day to sit with myself prepare for what was about to happen. This brings me to bereavement leave. My former workplace allowed for three days. I only took one because I was made to feel guilty about not being there. We need to care more about each other. We need to be given the opportunity to take care of ourselves. I think maybe showing a little more grace and humanity in life could do us all a world of good. 

Also, today is a bones day. So in honour of that, I am going to publish this and go for a walk in the sunshine with my dog and maybe meet my dad for wings. Get out there and kick bum!

This is Noodles, the current oracle.


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