No is not my favourite.

So, I didn't get the job. 

This was a different kind of rejection though. this company actually took the time to call me and let me know that they had gone in a different direction. And then she told me that I had done an amazing job in the interview and that I had a lot of the things they were looking for in a person. Not about my professional experience but me personally. 

It really made a big difference. It was probably not a big thing for her, but for me, it was a kindness. My brain has been wreaking all sorts of havoc with me lately. There have been lots of negative thoughts and dark places. Instead of this rejection sending me deeper into a spiral, this lifted me out a bit. I slept for five hours last night and woke up in a positive place. 

Rejection isn't always a bad thing. I am a big believer in the universe and what it provides. Maybe it's because I don't want to be the only thing in control of my life. Or maybe I need to think that there is something bigger out there. Either way, rejection is just a step towards something else. 

When I was laid off I was worried about how much my mental health would suffer. In the past cutting myself off from human interaction has not ended well for me. This time though it was different. The workplace I was in was so toxic that I needed to separate myself from who I was becoming there. Now almost six months later I realize what a gift I have been given. I have taken this time and found myself doing the thing I never thought I would ever get to do but that I always wanted to. 

Hearing no is hard. Usually, we hear that we aren't good enough instead of what is really being said. The challenge I think we need to give ourselves though is to listen for what else is coming with the no. Try to hear the positive within it. Then the spiral after might not be as deep. Then we will be ready to grab the good on the other side.